Things I’ve Done Already Today

Things I’ve done already today

Woke up
Talked to Mrs Nelmes about parents evening
Looked outside
Ripped my cold heart out of my chest
Made a teenager’s clothes smooth
Argued with a teenager
Won an argument with a teenager
Saw a wasp
Thought about the housework
Thought about burning my house down
Thought about going to prison
Decided to do the housework
Didn’t like the regional newsreader, ‘s shirt/tie combo
Watched the day get light (ish)
Said that Nuneaton would be a great place to go to diet
Got hated

Not bad for someone who has never met a real life Eskimo